Happy 2009

Happy New Year

Tradition

The Cat and the Canary

When I was in college, back when I was just a young whippersnapper, I owned a full Super8 print of Paul Leni's 1927 silent comedic murder mystery, "The Cat and the Canary." Okay, let's be totally honest. I still own it. It's here in my closet, along with my 8mm projector.

Since midnight figures into the plot somewhat significantly (the old man's will is read at midnight twenty years after his death), and since I rarely had anything to do on New Year's Eve, I developed a habit of watching "The Cat and the Canary" on New Year's Eve. I would start it just at the right time so that midnight in the movie would strike at midnight on New Year's Eve.

For the last five or ten years, Chip and I have gone to the Embarcadero to watch fireworks on New Year's Eve, so I don't perform my ritual exactly the same as I used to. But I still try to watch "The Cat and the Canary" close to New Year's, just out of personal habit (though now I watch the DVD, rather than go through the ritual of setting up the projector, the screen, picking out music for the soundtrack, etc.).

Of course, there's also that other classic New Year's Eve movie: "The Poseidon Adventure," wherein the cruise ship, SS Poseidon, is hit by a tidal wave and capsizes exactly at midnight on New Year's Eve:


Poseidon Adventure

Ho-ly crap!

We just got back from a minor shopping trip. I just wanted to pick up a couple of things at the grocery store.

Apparently, so did everyone else in San Francisco.

Traffic was horrifyingly constant and aggressive -- no way to consider turning left ever, except at traffic lights.

We tried two different Safeways. We circled the parking lots (or "contained traffic jams") without ever finding parking. While Chip circled the parking lot in the VW, I went into the second one (Church and Market). The checkout lines stretched halfway down every grocery aisle. I gave up and came home. I don't need Diet Coke badly enough to stand in a checkout line for 45 minutes in order to get it. I'll pay a little extra at the corner store, or I'll wait until tomorrow, when Safeway will be less crowded.

After such a light holiday shopping season, I was absolutely unprepared for this. It was the last thing I expected to see. This is unquestionably the worst traffic (indoor or outdoor) that I've seen in months, if not years.

Sheesh!

Sir Terry Pratchett

"Discworld" author Terry Pratchett is among those in the New Years Honours List. As of tomorrow, he will be Sir Terry Pratchett.

Both the BBC and the Times quote him as saying, “There are times when phrases such as ‘totally astonished’ just don’t do the job. I am of course delighted and honoured and, needless to say, flabbergasted.”

Simon's Sister's Dog

Simon's Sister's Dog

Not as funny as Simon's Cat. But this one's a promo for the RSPCA.

Year end (Part Three)

Pride Parade

I joined the San Francisco Lesbian/Gay Freedom Band in late 1991. Since 1992, I have marched in every Gay Pride parade except two: In 2000, I had minor foot surgery, and it was several months before I could walk without pain, so I did not march in the parade that year; and in 2008, chiefly due to work-related travel commitments,

In 2000, instead of marching, I babysat the band's post-parade information booth. So this year was the first year I've actually stood on Market Street and watched the parade since 1991.

You know, when you march in a parade, the only thing you remember about it is what you did and maybe the three or four floats or other entries that precede you and follow you. It leaves you with very narrow memories of what is actually a pretty huge event. If you've marched in your parade year after year after year, think about stepping out of it one year, just to remind yourself of what the event is.


Facebook

The woman who organized 1...2...3:45 6/7/8 posted a Facebook event page for it. So I signed up for a Facebook account in order to visit her event page. All I did was sign up -- I didn't post any photos of myself, type in any personal information or anything.

A couple of months later, someone in the band found me and sent a friend request. I accepted, and things snowballed from there.

This nice thing about it is that I have more contact than I used to with friends and relatives on the other side of the country.


Milk Memorial March


Milk Memorial March

Notice that the video refers to it as the "Memorial Concert & March." This event is usually better described as "Memorial Speeches and March." The SF Gay Men's Chorus also celebrated its 30th anniversary this year. And since their first public appearance was on the steps of City Hall at the end of the candlelight march, they performed several numbers on the steps of City Hall in between the speeches from Tom Ammiano, Willie Brown, Stuart Milk, Jonathon Moscone, etc.

This year, due (I think) to (a) the release of "Milk," (b) the fact that 2008 was the 30th anniversary of the assassinations and (c) the narrow passage of Prop 8, the Milk and Moscone Memorial March was much better attended than it has been in several years. As you can see in the video, I attended this year (for the first time in at least five years).


Gym

I did the unthinkable in September: I joined a gym.

Turning 47, I realized that I'm past the age where I can stay under 200 pounds without regular exercise.

It's amazing how much time a gym can take. If I leave work at 6, go home, change, then go to the gym for an hour and a half or two hours, I don't get home until after nine o'clock.

Oh, well. A fag's gotta do what a fag's gotta do.


Miscellaneous trivial items

** We went to see "The Drowsy Chaperone," "Spring Awakening" and "Rock 'n' Roll." We also went to see Dar Williams at Great American Music Hall and my nephew's band at Slim's. We had tickets to see Alison Moyet at the Warfield, but she canceled her tour a couple of weeks before she was scheduled to play here. Bummer.

** Favorite albums of the year: David Byrne/Brian Eno, "Everything That Happens Will Happen Today"; Bob Mould, "District Line"; Dar Williams, "Promised Land"; Grace Jones, "Hurricane"; Elvis Costello, "Momofuku."

** Favorite TV shows: 30 Rock, The Office, Stephen Fry In America, QI, Shameless,

** Favorite movies: Milk, Iron Man, The Dark Knight, Wall-E, Indiana Jones And the Kingdom Of the Crystal Skull. Sorry, I still haven't seen a good chunk of movies that came out this year. For example, I've got "Burn After Reading" from Netflix, but I haven't watched it yet.

** We went to the SF Zoo for the first time in over ten years. I'll have to do that again, and not wait ten years this time. Also on the "must do" list: Go to the newly reopened Academy of Sciences.

** Because of the blog, I started carrying a small 10 mega-pixel camera in my coat pocket at all times. The biggest plus of this is that I never say "Man, I wish I had a camera with me." The only downside is for people I run into accidentally. (That's not really true. When I ran into Joe "Joe.My.God" Jervis a couple of months ago, I never once pulled the camera out of my pocket.)

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I guess that's about as much of a summary of 2008 as I want to give.

We return you now to your regularly scheduled programming, already in progress.

"The IT Crowd" on IFC

Sorry to be late with this news.

IFC is showing the Channel 4 series, "The IT Crowd," on Tuesday nights. Tonight's episode was episode number 2, so they must have started last week.

Meanwhile, in the UK, Channel 4 is currently premiering Series 3 of "The IT Crowd."

For further entertainment and enlightenment, try reading "IT Crowd" and "Father Ted" creator Graham Linehan's blog, "Why, That's Delightful!"

Year end (Part Two)

MILK

Early in 2008, I went to a cattle-call audition for extras for a movie being made about Harvey Milk. I got no further contact from that cattle-call. But a citywide call went out to help recreate the massive candlelight march for the ending of the film. I still had some 1970s clothes in the closet from ten years ago when I auditioned for the original "Tales Of the City" series, so I dressed Chip and myself up to take part in the candlelight march. That filming was very interesting.For one thing, it kind of turned into "old home" night -- I kept running into people I knew. We wound up marching with a trumpet player and a clarinet player from the SF Lesbian/Gay Freedom Band.

The first time they filmed, everything was quiet and solemn and reverent. The second time they filmed, as we walked up Market toward Van Ness, someone inside one of the buildings started talking very loudly. It sounded like they were on the phone describing the candlelight march to them (even though this was after midnight, and possibly after one a.m.). I don't think they knew just how clearly their voice carried down the street. Then someone else turned on their motorcycle and started revving the engine. Apparently, though, these things did not interfere with the filming.

Then, a couple of months later, the band was asked to portray themselves (essentially). They were filming the 1978 Gay Pride parade, and they knew that the San Francisco Gay Freedom Day Marching Band and Twirling Corps had made its debut that year in the parade behind Harvey Milk's car. So they asked the band to come be in the parade behind Harvey's car. Almost all the footage they shot of the band wound up on the cutting room floor. But when the Blu-ray disc becomes available, you can bet that I'll be looking at my TV screen with a magnifying glass trying to identify faces.

Then, a couple of weeks after that, they asked the band to come back again. They also knew that the band had spontaneously marched into the "No on 6" victory party, so they asked the band to re-create that as well. So we stood around in an elementary school for six hours, then another hour or so filming inside what used to be the Rawhide.

Out of these three shoots, I got a total of about three seconds of screen time, in about three-quarters profile from behind. Apparently, I have a very recognizable head, though, because people keep asking if that was me (or telling me that they saw me -- apparently, my nephew nearly went berserk in a theater in Charleston when he recognized me in the film). I also got a movie prop -- a T-shirt bearing the band's original 1978 logo, which never really appears in the film at all.

Then, in the end of October, I had the great good fortune to be able to attend the world premiere of "Milk" at the Castro Theater. One of the partners in my firm was invited, and, since he would be out of town, he asked me to represent the firm at the event. I was way up in the balcony, but, dammit, at least I was there.


1...2...3:45 6/7/8

It was in Lynne Soffer's Dialects class that I met a woman who asked me if I would be interested in participating in a public event she was planning. Though I never heard her say it explicitly, I guess that she was inspired by Improv Everywhere's "Food Court Musical." She wanted as many people as possible to break into song and dance in Union Square. She got the necessary permits and permissions, and the event was officially part of the public entertainment in the square that day, scheduled to take place at 3:45 on June 7, 2008 (3:45 6/7/8).

I told her that a world where I don't dance is a better place for everyone concerned, but I would be happy to videotape the performance. We put Chip up on top of Macy's with one camera, and another guy who showed up with "What can I do to help" got another camera thrust into his hands. I posted the video at that time, but here it is again:


It's Oh So Quiet: Current.com

To be continued.

New Year's Eve Plans

Dame Edna interviews kd lang

For the first time ever, Chip and I have plans for New Year's Eve. We're going to see Dame Edna Everage at the Post Street Theater. Then we'll probably go down to the Embarcadero for the fireworks.

Year end (Part One)

It's time to take stock of the year that is about to end.

Edu-ma-cation

I took three classes at ACT -- Dialects (Lynne Soffer) starting in January; Improv (Barbara Scott) starting in March; and Movement / Viewpoints (Mark Jackson) starting in June. All three were wonderful and memorable classes with wonderful and memorable teachers, as well as wonderful and memorable classmates. Due to work-related travel requirements, I had to skip the fourth quarter, but I'm returning next week to take Voice and Speech (Jeffrey Draper).


This Blog

It was in April during Barbara's Improv class that I started this blog. I did it mainly because of her flatly stated attitude that positives help us much more than negatives -- not just in improvisation, but in life in general. So I wanted to create a space where I could keep away from the things in my life that cause me stress or that cause my personality to head toward negativity (thus the subtitle, "Nothing Serious" -- and if you don't know where the "Go, Play, Boy, Play" title comes from, go back here and read the first posting). This is why I often try to avoid talking about my job and politics, though if I do discuss them, I try to say mostly positive things.

Of course, it is impossible to discuss politics in any way without potentially creating some static somewhere -- for example, if I am overjoyed at knowing that the current president is leaving office and believe that his ceasing to be president will, in fact, reduce the basic level of my free-floating anxieties, there are many, many people out there who will disagree with me. Vocally. But, in the immortal words of Bette Midler, "Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke."

Here's all I'll say about work: In another few months, none of my long-standing (2-8 years) clients will be in the same line of business that they were in two years ago. (Oddly enough, this is not actually a result of the economic crisis -- the companies were headed in this direction already.) This by itself is a source of stress for me, because it means that all my routines are overturned. I have actually pointed out that, since my work is already in transition, maybe now would be a good time to take me off those clients completely and give me clients closer to home. So keep your fingers crossed for me, that maybe all the trips to Southern California might be reduced or eliminated.


To be continued.

Hedgehog eating a carrot

Hedgehog eating a carrot

From Wired's Top 10 Incredible Animal Videos of the year.

Also check out the Transformer Owl -- an owl that changes its shape in reaction to seeing other owls.

Stephen Fry's Podgrams

I am a language pedant, I'll admit it. Not always, but often.

I also know that pedantry is of limited use (at best), and I frequently quote Charles Caleb Colton on pedantry: "Pedantry is the showy display of knowledge which crams our heads with learned lumber and then takes out our brains to make room for it."

In his latest podgram, Stephen Fry takes on pedantry and makes a well-reasoned argument against it. For example, what's the real point of being irritated by signs that read "Ten items or less"? Granted, "Ten items or fewer" is the more correct phrase, but does the incorrect usage prevent you from understanding the writer's intent?

However, there is one noticeable omission in Mr. Fry's argument. He argues that campaigning against the verbing of nouns (e.g., "I've been tasked with actioning four of the agendaed items"). According to Fry, the usage may be new, but that does not make it wrong. Language, he says, evolves over time. Common usage makes such changes correct.

I do not dispute these arguments. However, these arguments do not address the issue that I object to in these usages. What irks me most about the verbing of nouns and other forms of business-speak is not the heresies being committed on the English language. Rather, what irks me is the attitude underlying such changes. Ninety-nine times out of a hundred, these usages are coined by corporate management who do it to prove how creative they are.

They refer to "growing" their businesses because they believe that it imparts the image of their business as a fragile garden that must be tended and cultivated, lest it should wither on the vine.

I have yet to see a corporation to which a garden metaphor is appropriate. Additionally, the terms "growing one's business" is actually quite vague: does one intend to embark on an advertising campaign to bring more customers into an existing location, or does one intend to open new stores, or does one simply intend to hire a lot of new employees in the mistaken belief that ten men can dig a hole ten times as fast as one man can? There is almost always a more descriptive word or phrase that one can use.

They issue memos that the term "brainstorming session" might possibly be offensive to epileptics, so in future, staff should instead use the more sensitive term, "thought showers."

They "task you to do [x]" because it takes more words to say "give you the task of doing [x]," so they're just being efficient.

I would like to point out that I find it easy enough to forgive the "ten items or less" signs precisely because the meaning is still clear, even if the usage is not. However, one of the hallmarks of corporatisms is the fact that they are ultimately more confusing than helpful, and the speaker's intentions would be more clearly communicated if they were to stick to more conventional phrases.

Despite this omission, like all of Mr. Fry's podgrams, this episode is interesting, entertaining and thought-provoking. If you've not been listening to them, go subscribe and catch up.

Buh-Bye.

Top Ten Bush Moments

The video is from over a year ago, but now seems like a good time to reflect on just a few of the many ways in which the President restored dignity to his office.

Kids these days, I swear.

Via Gizmodo:

A young man in Portsmouth, NH, got a Nintendo Wii for Christmas this year from his grandparents. But he didn't want a Wii. So he threw a temper tantrum.

The only problem is that he's not six years old. He's 25.

When he started complaining about receiving the Wii, his girlfriend told him he was being ungrateful and making his grandparents feel bad. So he hit her. Then she hit back, and things escalated.

According to the Boston Herald, "Police were called to South Street home where the couple lived with Blom’s grandparents at 1:55 p.m. Christmas day. Officers arrested the pair upon observing bruises on each of them.

"Portsmouth police said tempers flared because the boyfriend was smarting over not getting the present he wished for. 'Heath Blom wanted a remote-controlled airplane for Christmas, and not the Wii,' said Sgt. Kuffer Kaltenborn.

"Blom, a flooring contractor, said the cops got it wrong, and that he had asked his grandparents to get him the $1,000 airplane for his birthday next April. 'You can’t fly an RC plane in the snow,' he said.

Union Square, Christmas Eve

I did some last-minute shopping early this afternoon in Union Square. As you can see, San Francisco is completely overcast and gray today.

It wasn't the total mob scene that you might have expected. The only place where it was really difficult to walk down the sidewalk was outside Macy's, especially at the windows with the SPCA kittens and puppies in the window. Okay, I only saw kittens, but I couldn't get close enough to see much. I just assume that they had puppies as they have done in the past.

I also snapped a few photos around the Safeway and Macy's ice skating rink in Union Square. As you can see, it wasn't exactly a mob scene, either. The on-again-off-again rain probably had something to do with this.

Still, Union Square is always good for a few quickie photos, so here you go -- ice skating, the tree and the menorah.

As always, if you click on the photos, you'll get a larger 1248X936 version.

Dance-Along Nutcracker on NPR

As I mentioned previously, I spoke with an NPR reporter between shows or between acts (I honestly don't remember which anymore) of this year's Dance-Along Nutcracker, and I expressed my hopes that I hadn't said anything too terribly stupid or embarrassing.

Well, I needn't have worried, because he didn't use a single word from my interview in the final story, which aired on "Morning Edition" this morning.

Unfortunately, I can't embed the audio here. I can only give you link to where you can find the story on NPR's website..

Unbridled enthusiasm

Go Tell It On the Mountain

Via Boing Boing:

This clip from a public access station shows two women singing "Go Tell It On the Mountain" with a karaoke tape with background vocals included. Their energy and enthusiasm just drip from your computer monitor.

The original source for the clip is a blog called "Classical Gas Emissions" that originates in Winnipeg.

A more subtle alarm clock

Less than day after I stumble across the Mensa clock, I find the Jeeves clock.

Its alarm starts with the sound of chirping birds. Then there is a discreet coughing, and Stephen Fry's voice says one of "nearly 150" Jeeves-ish phrases. Such as "Let us seize the day and take it roughly from behind... as the Colonel used to say, in his unfortunate way." Or "I am delighted you have survived another night. If you would allow a personal note, sir, may I add my own small congratulations to the roar of the world's approval? Thank you, sir."

This is followed by a beeping noise, which is interrupted by Fry/Jeeves saying, "Ghastly noise, I agree, sir."

The clock comes in three versions: Original; Deluxe - Good Morning, Sir; and .Deluxe - Good Morning Madam.

The item is not available for sale on Firebox's US site. And while it is available on their UK site, only the "Deluxe - Good Morning, Sir," version is in stock as of this writing.

Here's a link to a video of a very long message referred to as "Relaxation Message."

PBS Documentary This Week

Grey Gardens: From East Hampton to Broadway is a new documentary about Little Edie, Big Edie, the famous documentary about them and the Broadway musical based on that documentary.

From the show's website:

"GREY GARDENS: From East Hampton to Broadway picks up the thread of this compelling mother-daughter story, weaving together clips from the Maysles brothers’ film with insightful interviews featuring Albert Maysles, societal and cultural commentators and the creators of the Broadway show. The documentary is a backstage pass into the creative process that brought one of America’s most haunted and haunting families from an original cult movie to the Great White Way."

The show is scheduled to air on KQED (Cable 9) and KQED HD (Cable 709) Tuesday, December 23, at 11:01 p.m. and again Wednesday, December 24, at 5:01 a.m. (yes, you read that right -- A.M.), and then on KQED Life (KQEDL - Cable 189) on Wednesday at 10:01 a.m. and on Thursday at 4:01 a.m.

Mensa Alarm Clock

Via Gizmodo:

RC Wonders in the UK is selling an alarm clock that is branded by Mensa.org.uk (although Mensa does not sell the clock themselves).

When the alarm goes off, you cannot turn it off immediately. First, you have to play a little game of Simon -- that is, the clock flashes a series of colored lights at you, and you have to repeat the pattern back to the clock. The patterns come in three levels of difficulty (your choice).

If you fail to repeat the pattern correctly or in the allotted amount of time, the alarm starts ringing louder. The alarm continues until you eventually succeed.

RC Wonders is also selling the clock through eBay.

I guess my question would be about AC power compatibility -- if it's made in the UK, can you plug it into the wall in the US? I guess they've faced this issue, since they specifically state how to buy from the US.

Ad agency holiday party invitation

Charlie Brown Ad Agency

Via Boing Boing:

"I won a silver Addie!"

Digital madness

A few months ago, a friend of mine who works for a public television station made mention of having to show the half-hour digital TV primer yet again. I responded that she could run it 24/7 until February, and she'd still be flooded with calls from people asking why their TV didn't work anymore.

According to a story in the New York Times, not everyone is clear on the concept of what the switch to digital TV actually means.

The Times says that a Consumers Union poll shows:

90% of the public are aware that something is going to change.

25% think that they will be required to subscribe to cable or satellite..

41% think that converter boxes are required for TVs that are connected to cable or satellite.

"'This transition is possibly one of the worst understood consumer education programs in modern times,' said Richard Doherty, an analyst with the Envisioneering Group.... 'On Feb. 18, there will be a tremendous amount of finger-pointing'....

"Congress has allowed analog stations to stay on the air an additional 30 days to broadcast educational messages about the transition. And the cable TV industry has agreed not to switch some of its channels to a digital tier until March 1, to avoid further confusing consumers about the broadcast switch.

"To make matters worse, the transition date occurs when the weather in most of the country is at its coldest and iciest.

"'We’re asking the elderly to go out in the snow to buy a converter box?' Mr. Kelsey said. 'All we need on Feb. 18 is to have someone slip off their roof and get injured as they try to set up a new digital antenna.'"

Everything That Happens

The deluxe CD version of David Byrne and Brian Eno's new album, "Everything That Happens Will Happen Today" happened today. It's pretty damn nifty, in a very David Byrne and Brian Eno kind of way.

The tin looks like this, with a plastic house glued to the top (more views below). When you take the lid off, there is a device in the lid that plays sounds (I won't try to describe the sounds, but they go on for about 30 seconds).

(Click on photos to see more detailed enlargements.)













Disc One is labeled, "Stick," while Disc Two is labeled, "Rock." The second disc includes four tracks that are not available on any other version of the album. The are "Never Thought," "Walking Along the River," "The Eyes" and "The Painting." It also includes a nine-minute video called, "The Story Behind the Album." The video is iPod compatible (at least, it works with my iPod Touch).













Under the two discs are a small white book containing the lyrics to all the songs and some notes from Byrne and Eno and some pictures. To the left of the book is a red and white capsule. There is no indication what the capsule is for, but there was a slip of paper in the box explaining that "The pill in this tin contains calcium carbonate, the active ingredient found in common antacids. Consult a doctor if you are taking a prescription drug as calcium carbonate may interact with certain prescription drugs.Keep out of reach of children." To the right of the booklet is a six-sided die with several phrases such as "A RUNNY SLICE," and "SMELLS AND FLAVORS.".

Compare and contrast

Elaine Paige - If You Love Me

Here's the same song in English performed by Elaine Paige from her stage portrayal of Edith Piaf.

Discuss.

Hymne à l'amour

Hymne à l'amour

Sorry I've been so quiet recently. I just haven't found too much that was interesting, and I've been a bit busy at work.

So here's some Piaf to break the monotony of all the holiday music that's so rampant right now. No real reason why I picked it. I just ran across it while searching YouTube.

Do you bite your thumb at us, sir?

From Overheard Everywhere:

Teen boy: (glares at brother, bites thumb)

Younger brother: Mom! He's non-verbally quoting Shakespeare at me again!

--Denver, Colorado

Susie Bright on Boing Boing

Susie Bright (who I know has at least one friend in the band) attended this weekend's Dance-Along Nutcracker and then blogged about it on Boing Boing today. It's a very nice blurb -- read the whole posting at this link. Excerpt follows:

"When I was a little wanna-be ballerina, I could barely remain still at sit-down Nutcracker events; I ached to waltz with the other Flowers. In the 1960s, the kids in my parish would run around with fake swords and wild scarves as we recreated the whole shebang to the scratchy amplification of the nuns' beat-up record player. I think I peed in my pants one time -- please don't tell the Nutcracker Prince.

"The Freedom Band's version is far better, with more room to take a flying leap, and an incredibly patient orchestra who play the entire show in costume while scores of little children sit at their feet with mouths hanging open. I am tempted to take up the piccolo again."

Dance Along

Four shows in two days.

The San Francisco Lesbian/Gay Freedom Band's Dance-Along Nutcracker is now over for another year.

This was the band's fifteenth consecutive Dance-Along to be held at the Forum at Yerba Buena Center for the Arts.

The band is currently searching for a permanent artistic director and conductor. This year's Nutcracker was guest conducted by Jadine Louie, who was the band's conductor and artistic director from 1996 through 2006.

The stars of this year's show were Trauma Flintstone and Donna Sachet. Caroline Carvajal choreographed yet again, featuring many dancers who have performed in the Dance-Along several times in the past (Corinne Levy, Kelly Collins and Juan Crovetto, to name a few).

This year's theme was "Bah, Humbug!", combining the story of the Nutcracker with the story of Charles Dickens's "A Christmas Carol."

This afternoon, during intermission at the last show, I spoke with someone from NPR about the history of the Nutcracker. I hope I didn't embarrass myself or the band too severely with anything I said.

Chip seemed convinced that my Jack Skellington costume would scare kids. He swears that he heard people booing when I came in this morning. Conversely, I know that a woman and three kids ran up to me immediately after the show to ask to have their pictures taken with me. Proving, yet again, that one man's quivering terror is another's pure delight.

Yesterday, I was up at 6:30 a.m., and we got home at 11:30 p.m. I stayed up until 3:00 a.m. processing photos and reviewing videotapes in order to map out the cameras for today's shows. Then I got up at 7:30 this morning and got home around 7:00 tonight. Needless to say, I'm a little tired. Chip fell asleep on the sofa, and now is snoring away in the bedroom (I convinced him to relocate).

At least I have tomorrow off work to recuperate.

(Note: If you saw any of these photos on Facebook and are annoyed by the repetition, click on the photos. They're much larger than the ones you see on Facebook.)

From the "you learn something new every day" file

Today, "Overheard In New York" used the term "crotch-walk" twice in the space of about four hours. Now, I can pretty well figure out from context what they mean by "crotch walk," but I just wanted to be sure that I understood it. So I went digging on the Internets for some answers.

As it turns out, that is easier said than done. Urban Dictionary does not have an entry for it. A Yahoo search provided a wide array of possible answers, none of which fit the context used in "Overheard," and, frankly, some of which were basically pornographic. Finally, a Google search produced several videos that support my initial image (but I won't embed any here, you can go follow the link if you really are that curious).

However, one of the several interpretations provided by the Yahoo search pointed to the term "crotch-walk" as being a method of shoplifting -- the one demonstrated by Divine in "Pink Flamingos" ("I kept it warm in my own oven!").

And my favorite quote, the most vivid mental image of all, came from a crime prevention site that stated, "'Crotch-walking' is a technique used by women wearing full skirts and dresses. They simply place the merchandise between their thighs and walk away. Thieves who are good at this have been known to steal hams, TYPEWRITERS, and other large objects" [my emphasis].

I'm sorry, if there's anyone out there who can successfully sneak a typewriter out of a store by holding it between his or her thighs and walking out the door without attracting any attention to himself or herself, that is someone who I just plain don't want to meet in a dark alley. Definitely someone to stay on the good side of.

Come to think of it, anyone who can disguise carrying a ham between their legs deserves some respect as well -- even the small ones are HUGE. If I tried doing that, I'd be walking bowlegged for a month afterward.

Unfortunate product names

Board game ad

Add this one to the list of unfortunate names, along with the infamous chocolate candy called "Dingleberries" (at 7:15):

Oy, Holy Night

Oy, Holy Night

Found via... well, he knows who he is.

I'm impressed. She managed to do this without going to any of the obvious off-color "Fall on your knees" puns.

This year's Novelty-Do-Gooder-Christmas video

Do One Thing

Video for the BBC's "Do One Thing For Nature For Christmas" campaign.

Some of the ideas they suggest for things you can do for nature include: Feed mammals; Make a wood pile; Provide water for birds; Collect rain water.

Fairytale of New York

Fairytale of New York

Best. Christmas. Song. Ever.

Kirsty MacColl lives.

December Will Be Magic Again

Kate acoustic television appearance


Kate lip-sync television appearance


Fan lip-sync to studio recording

This is partly in response to someone's recent discourse on Christmas music. Kate only mentions Saint Nicholas and "Silent Night" in passing.

Also, this is partly in response to my iPod dredging this up on Shuffle while I was on the way to work this morning.

And this is partly just because I like the song, which is on the verge of turning 30 years old.

More video of kittens....

Kittens on a slide

If I thought our cats would use it this way, I would install one of these slides in the living room. They need to get more exercise.

i can has downtown

Via San Francisco Love Story:

I CAN HAS DOWNTOWN IS:

lol hipsters
shambolic dance party memes
a place for friends… to laugh at each other
a place for friends… to laugh at other people
drunken laughs hugs and magic

You can has downtown too!

Plagiarism?

Coldplay/Satriani

Guitarist Joe Satriani has filed suit against Coldplay, claiming that the melody and chord progression of their 2008 song, "Viva la Vida," are directly lifted from his 2004 instrumental piece, "If I Could Fly."

Reuters story here (though, frankly, the story is pretty much summed up in the one sentence above).

Shades of "Slings and Arrows"

In the television series, "Slings and Arrows," Geoffrey Tennant goes to great lengths to ensure that Oliver Welles's skull is quietly used in the New Burbage production of Hamlet, as directed in Oliver's secret will left with his assistant.

This BBC story mirrors that story enough that I wonder if maybe it's more than coincidence -- that maybe the authors of "Slings and Arrows" knew this story and used it.

In 1982, Andre Tchaikowsky (a concert pianist) passed away from cancer and donated his body to science -- except for his head. He requested that his skull be donated to the Royal Shakespeare Company and used in productions of Hamlet.

The RSC has not ever actually used the skull in a production until recently. In their current production of "Hamlet" starring David "Dr. Who" Tennant, they decided to use Tchaikowsky's skull.

According to the BBC story, "...the company says a fake skull will be used when ("Hamlet") transfers to London. Tennant was the first actor to use Mr Tchaikowsky's skull during Hamlet's famous grave-digger scene. Audiences in Stratford were unaware the skull belonged to the Oxford pianist, but the secret was revealed by Tennant. The RSC told Channel 4 News that now the secret was out, it would be 'too distracting for the audience' if the skull was used."

Droidel

Via Boing Boing.

Pattern and instructions here

Truly, I can think of nothing more to say about this one.

Prop 8: The Musical

See more Jack Black videos at Funny or Die

An all-star cast, featuring Jack Black, Neil Patrick Harris, Marc Shaiman, Margaret Cho, Andy Richter, Maya Rudolph, Barrett Foa, Nicole Parker, John C. Reilly, Allison Janney, Kathy Najimy, Rashida Jones, Sarah Chalke, and many many more. Written by Marc Shaiman. Directed and staged by Adam Shankman.

Rent Cinecast DVD

DVDPriceSearch shows a February 3, 2009, release date for the DVD and Blu-ray release of the cinecast version of "Rent."

DVDEmpire is taking pre-orders, also shows a release date of February 3, 2009.

DeepDiscount is also taking pre-orders, and also shows a release date of February 3, 2009.

Amazon is taking pre-orders, and also shows a release date of February 3, 2009.

As of this writing (1 a.m., December 3rd), the Wikipedia entry for "Rent: Filmed Live on Broadway" has not been updated to show a video release, but the IMDB entry was updated a week ago.

NetRight again

Apparently, I am now subscribed to their daily newsletter that is chock full o' conservative goodness, regardless of whether I asked for it.

So let's play.

Here are two of the stories they recommended I post;

E-mail smear campaign against Nancy Pelosi is untrue: A widely circulated e-mail accusing Nancy Pelosi of granting minimum wage exemptions to a company that her husband owned stock in is incorrect on two fronts: (1) the company in question was not granted a wage exemption and (2) her husband has never owned stock in that company.

E-mail smear campaign against Barack Obama is untrue: A widely circulated e-mail claimed that Barack Obama filed a class-action suit that required banks to loan money to poor people who could not repay the loans, and thus he personally caused the current economic crisis. In fact, the suit in question only charged that one particular bank had discriminated in its lending practices (rejecting applications from black people but approving loans to white people with equal income and economic status). As an attorney, Obama worked on the case for about three hours but was not in charge of it.

Okay, I'm lying. They do not recommend these stories at all. Really, their top stories today involve Barack Obama's "identity crisis" (he used to be called "Barry," but not anymore, so what's up with that?) and a video of Fred Thompson talking about the economy. Pretty innocuous and petty stuff, actually.

But as long as they feel free to sign me up for their "conservative hot topics" newsletter without my approval, and as long as they misrepresent me as being a "conservative blogger," then I'll feel free to misrepresent what they stand for. It only seems fair.

The difference is that I will tell you when I'm lying.

Heckfire and spamnation.

Your one-stop shopping for conservative talking points.

Arriving, unsolicted, in my mailbox is this lovely invitation:


-------(begin quoted e-mail)-------

For Immediate Release
November 24th, 2008

It is my distinct pleasure, as the president of Americans for Limited Government, to invite you today to become a key member of the exciting new conservative “bloggers central,” NetRightNation.com.

At ALG, we recognize the critical role you as a blogger play in gathering, assimilating, and disseminating news and commentary. And I, personally, am deeply grateful to you for taking the lead in fighting some of the most important battles our country has faced over the past decade, and more.

That's why I am so pleased to announce that NetRightNation.com is providing bloggers like you, the mainstream media, politicians, and other opinion leaders free, instant access to nearly 60,000 conservative blogs nationwide. And counting.

As a complete service bureau, NRN provides you a wide new array of blogger opportunities. As a featured blogger on NRN, you will be able to post your own blogs and interface with other like-minded bloggers nationwide. You will soon be able to “claim” your blog and customize your blog profile.

Information on NRN – blogs, as well as Twitter feeds -- will be divided by state, as well as by issue, to make it easy for you and others to access. NRN will also include a sophisticated search engine function and will soon have the capability for you to subscribe to customized email blog feeds on your topics of choice. Stay tuned, for these features will soon be online!

And all of that is just the beginning. In fact, I have asked ALG's Director of New Media, Adam Bitely, to follow up on this note with a letter of his own providing you the exciting details on how NRN can help you grow your own blog.

Above all, we want to make sure NRN is all that you, an important member of the conservative blogosphere, want it to be. So, as you visit NetRightNation.com, I urge you to please give us your input on how to make it the valuable asset we are committed to providing, at absolutely no charge.

Thank you for all that you are doing. I look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,

Bill Wilson
President, Americans for Limited Government

###

Americans for Limited Government is a non- partisan, nationwide network committed to advancing free market reforms,private property rights and core American liberties. For more information on ALG please call us at 703-383-0880 or visit our website at www.GetLiberty.org.

-------(end quoted e-mail)-------

You have to love the blatant, oblivious (one hopes) irony of a self-proclaimed non-partisan network that exclusively promotes conservative blogging. Apparently, they don't read the blogs that they solicit with this e-mail. I poked around enough to see multiple comments along the lines of "how dare you send me this garbage."

Apparently, also, they feel that they need to resort to spamming every blog on blogspot to maximize the damage they can cause.

Step One: I'm reporting the spam.