It has only taken eight years, but local theatrical producer, Charles Hewitt, has finally come up with the follow-up to his previous musical, "Boo!"
"Expectations have been high," Hewitt said in a recent interview, "but I think we've finally hit on just the right concept. This time, we're going even more literary. We're talking Kafka, baby!"
The new musical will be based not just on one Kafka work, but several.
"The core of the piece will be 'The Metamorphosis,' but it will be combined with 'The Trial,' and 'The Castle,' plus some of the shorter works like 'In the Penal Colony' or 'Before the Law.' Plus we'll be writing our own new Kafkaesque story that will link them all together into one narrative whole. Then, the second act will show us what happens to all the characters after the end of Kafka's stories. Well, maybe not all of them, but certainly those characters who were still alive at the end of their stories."
When asked if he felt this was similar in any way to "Into the Woods," Hewitt looked confused and said, "What is that? Never heard of it."
Asked if he had actually read Kafka's works, Hewitt replied, "Well, to be honest, no, I haven't. But I studied most of them in college. Some of them. I think. I'm pretty sure. I mean, I was supposed to read them, and I was assigned them to read, but, you know, the professor always tells you all about them in class and discusses the major plot points and the meanings. And I still have all my college notes to refer to, so I don't even have to rely on my memory. Plus this time I'll be working with some people who really did read these things. I think. I'm pretty sure. Definitely. Definitely pretty sure. They said they read them, yeah."
"We're not stopping there, though. We'll be throwing in little sly references to other classic literary works, like 'Crime And Punishment,' '1984,' 'The Bell Jar,' 'The Stranger,' 'No Exit,' and 'The Gulag Archipelago,' just to name a few."
Hewitt continues, "The costumes are going to be memorable. Gregor Samsa wasn't really a cockroach, you know. Not everybody knows this. Did you know this? Gregor Samsa wasn't a cockroach. He was a vermin, a bug, but not necessarily a cockroach. An 'ungeheures Ungeziefer' is what Kafka called him. So we get to play with exactly what that means and make a costume that gives our interpretation of whatever the hell that's supposed to mean. And that whole 'apple lodged in his back thing, we're thinking more 'Carmen Miranda fruit salad hat.' It seems more appropriate for a musical.
"We've already finished some of the songs. So far we've got 'Everyone Who's Guilty Says That,' 'We Didn't Tell Him He's Condemned,' and the title song, 'Give It Up!' Toe-tappers, every single one of them."
Hewitt's harshest critics (who wish to remain anonymous) have provided the following reactions:
"If a man has his eyes bound, you can encourage him as much as you like to stare through the bandage, but he'll never see anything. "
"It's only because of his stupidity that he is able to be so sure of himself."