Tuesday, July 22, 2008

New Nike shoe

[UPDATE 7/28: Nike has pulled part of this ad campaign. Read more here.]

[This is all over the net, but I saw it first at

This poster is part of the new Nike ad campaign for the "Hyperdunk," a new shoe Nike will be releasing on July 26th.

All of the posters show people using the new "Hyperdunk" to jump, apparently, so high that they can push their crotches in their opponents' faces (or at least to dunk the ball more easily than ever before, and then wag their privates at the opposing team while hanging from the basket). The slogans that have been used on the actual posters include "That Ain't Right," "Say Hello," "Isn't That Cute" and "Now You Know." The campaign as a whole (but especially the poster captioned "THAT AIN'T RIGHT") has come under fire as being overtly homophobic, and the whole thing has sparked some pretty vehement confrontations all over. View the full line of posters here and read the cool, calm, collected comments that have been left for the makers of the ads.

Here are my own, pesonal Top 10 Rejected Slogans for the Nike "Hyperdunk" Posters (same photos, new slogans):

10. "No Talking With Your Mouth Full"

9. "Deeper Than Deep, Your Throat" (apologies to Linda Lovelace)

8. "Wimps Spit. Real Men Swallow."

7. "Say Hello To My Little Friend!"

6. "I Promise I'll Still Respect You Tomorrow."

5. "Take Out Your F-----g Retainer!" (nod to Jello Biafra)

4. "How Many Times Do You Like Your Teabags Dunked?"

3. "Suck, Dammit! 'Blow' Is Just a Figure Of Speech!"

2. "Is IT In You?" (oops, sorry, wrong sports product)

1. "Just Do Me."

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