Less than day after I stumble across the Mensa clock, I find the Jeeves clock.
Its alarm starts with the sound of chirping birds. Then there is a discreet coughing, and Stephen Fry's voice says one of "nearly 150" Jeeves-ish phrases. Such as "Let us seize the day and take it roughly from behind... as the Colonel used to say, in his unfortunate way." Or "I am delighted you have survived another night. If you would allow a personal note, sir, may I add my own small congratulations to the roar of the world's approval? Thank you, sir."
This is followed by a beeping noise, which is interrupted by Fry/Jeeves saying, "Ghastly noise, I agree, sir."
The clock comes in three versions: Original; Deluxe - Good Morning, Sir; and .Deluxe - Good Morning Madam.
The item is not available for sale on Firebox's US site. And while it is available on their UK site, only the "Deluxe - Good Morning, Sir," version is in stock as of this writing.
Here's a link to a video of a very long message referred to as "Relaxation Message."
My favorite garlic crusher
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