Introducing the Uro Club. It makes a great gift for the golfer who has everything except a Stadium Pal (made infamous by David Sedaris).
My favorite thing about the Stadium Pal website is the question, "What if you want to buy the Stadium Pal as a gift?" (because there's just no discreet way to get the gift recipient to use the sizing guide to ensure a proper fit -- it conjures up a lovely image of someone waking up in the middle of the night to find his SO fumbling under the sheets. "What are you doing down there, honey?" "Oh, I'm just measuring you for a special gift. I wanted it to be a surprise.").
Well, that and the testimonials from happy Stadium Pal customers (e.g., "Had two friends fishing with me yesterday and they just couldn't understand how I could go so long without relieving myself. Little did they know that while they were standing on the swim platform, hoping not to fall in the water, I was simply smiling and letting nature take her course. My new pal works like a dream and its nice not having to fumble with ice cold fingers and going the traditional way.").
Less than day after I stumble across the Mensa clock, I find the Jeeves clock.
Its alarm starts with the sound of chirping birds. Then there is a discreet coughing, and Stephen Fry's voice says one of "nearly 150" Jeeves-ish phrases. Such as "Let us seize the day and take it roughly from behind... as the Colonel used to say, in his unfortunate way." Or "I am delighted you have survived another night. If you would allow a personal note, sir, may I add my own small congratulations to the roar of the world's approval? Thank you, sir."
This is followed by a beeping noise, which is interrupted by Fry/Jeeves saying, "Ghastly noise, I agree, sir."
The clock comes in three versions: Original; Deluxe - Good Morning, Sir; and .Deluxe - Good Morning Madam.
The item is not available for sale on Firebox's US site. And while it is available on their UK site, only the "Deluxe - Good Morning, Sir," version is in stock as of this writing.
Here's a link to a video of a very long message referred to as "Relaxation Message."
RC Wonders in the UK is selling an alarm clock that is branded by Mensa.org.uk (although Mensa does not sell the clock themselves).
When the alarm goes off, you cannot turn it off immediately. First, you have to play a little game of Simon -- that is, the clock flashes a series of colored lights at you, and you have to repeat the pattern back to the clock. The patterns come in three levels of difficulty (your choice).
If you fail to repeat the pattern correctly or in the allotted amount of time, the alarm starts ringing louder. The alarm continues until you eventually succeed.
RC Wonders is also selling the clock through eBay.
I guess my question would be about AC power compatibility -- if it's made in the UK, can you plug it into the wall in the US? I guess they've faced this issue, since they specifically state how to buy from the US.
The 2008 graduates of the San Francisco Circus Center's Clown Conservatory have posed for a 2009 Naked Clown Calendar to raise funds for Multiple Sclerosis.
Chad Benjamin Potter, who headed the project, says the calendar is not lewd. He says, "I am going to sell (the calendar) to my grandmother and I also want to sell it to my niece and my nephew."
[UPDATE: For more direct information, see the Naked Clown Blog.]
The irony of this video is not that the music is virtually indecipherable (would you believe it's intended to be the "William Tell" Overture, or the "Lone Ranger" Theme?).
The irony comes at the end of the video: "This road is in Lancaster Ca. Ave. K going W/B from 60th St. W. to 70th W You will be seeing more of these in the future" (my emphasis).
The video was posted to YouTube on September 14. One week later, on September 21, the BBC posted a story saying ". . . some Lancaster residents are not amused. They say the noise from the road sounds more like a discordant screech than the Rossini overture. Officials have bowed to their views and have agreed to pave over the grooves. . . . Although the grooves were carved into the road only a couple of weeks ago, officials have announced they will resurface the quarter-mile (400m) strip on Tuesday. "
This lovely Ozymandias trophy is available from Topatoco, seller of such novelty T-shirts as "I'm made of meat!" and "Building a Fake Future in hopes that the real future will show up to mate with it," and (in a font mimicking a movie trailer announcement) "The following PERSON has been approved for ALL AUDIENCES so don't worry it's okay you can talk to me."
They also sell another shirt with a drawing of the "PED XING" man in a top hat riding a penny-farthing with the caption, "NOT A CRIME." The catalog page bears the following description: "FACE IT! As part of the top-hat wearing intellectual elite, you find yourself the constant target of mockery and derision for your chosen mode of transport! Stick it to the Man with a shirt that says, 'Hey world, I bite my thumb at thee.'"
Novelty T- shirts made by people who assume their target audience actually remembers things they learned in English class. What a concept!
According to an article in Time Magazine, it turns out that there are a few problems with the spray-on condom.
First, there's the delivery system. "The prototype ... consists of a hard plastic tube with nozzles that spray liquid latex from all directions, much like the water jets in the tunnel of a car wash. ... Some (of the men testing the product) were 'a little bit afraid to use the tube' and would only try it on their fingers."
Second, there's the noise: "Others worried that the mechanism, which hisses as it sprays, might ruin the mood."
But the biggest problem of all is the waiting time. "Liquid latex currently takes two to three minutes to vulcanize, making it impractical. 'For people to buy it,' (inventor Jan Vinzenz) Krause says, 'it needs to be ready in five to 10 seconds.'"
In the meantime, manufacturers of traditional condoms have expanded the number of sizes available. But again, there's one problem: "men aren't very eager to buy a small size."
See? I did the whole posting without succumbing to the temptation to point out the "Hard Sell" pun in the article's headline.
Found in many references.
Via Boing Boing:
Less than day after I stumble across the Mensa clock, I find the Jeeves clock.
Via Gizmodo:
Via Boing Boing.
Source: Contra Costa Times
Coming soon to a Dixieland Dykes +3 gig near you!
This lovely Ozymandias trophy is available from Topatoco, seller of such novelty T-shirts as "I'm made of meat!" and "Building a Fake Future in hopes that the real future will show up to mate with it," and (in a font mimicking a movie trailer announcement) "The following PERSON has been approved for ALL AUDIENCES so don't worry it's okay you can talk to me."
Novelty T- shirts made by people who assume their target audience actually remembers things they learned in English class. What a concept!
According to an article in Time Magazine, it turns out that there are a few problems with the spray-on condom.
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