THE BOOK OF YELLING!!

Found for sale at Amazon.com.

I really encourage you to follow the link and view Amazon's "Look Inside" excerpts.  You will find that:


(1)  The book, whose main message seems already to have been put so eloquently and concisely in the title, is over 600 pages long (the tenth chapter, "POEMS AND PRAISE TO OUR CREATOR GOD: AND TO OUR  LORD AND SAVIOR EMMANUEL JESUS WHO IS >" starts on page 617);

(2) In order to indicate how important every word in the book really is, THE *ENTIRE BOOK SEEMS TO BE WRITTEN IN **ALL **CAPS!!  AND SEEMS TO USE>; A LOT: OF *EXCLAMATION MARKS: AND: COLONS: >> AND >s AND **ASTERISKS WITH> *NO: *APP:AR>;ENT MOTIV:*A>:TION !!!

(3)  I'm not even going to comment on the spelling and grammar.  And use of incomplete sentences.  And overuse of question marks??? 

(4) It seems the author's parents had a creative approach to the name "Elizabeth."

(5) Though the title claims that the book is about birth control (not just abortion, but condoms, pills and other contraceptives), the chapter titles seem to indicate that a lot of the book is about "Where the Church went wrong," "Some more of the Church's greatest mistakes" and "Well, that about wraps it up for the Church" (apologies to Douglas Adams).

One of Amazon's 92 user reviews puts it quite well: 

"Despite being written entirely in BLOCK CAPITALS, this self-published work conveys its message elegantly. In fact, you don't even need to read it to understand the main argument being put forward.

"True, by avoiding this book you will miss out on the precise location of the heretical surfboard worshipped by the British royal family and the sinister significance of Abe Lincoln's unholy quadrille. You will also miss out on the explanation of why the Hairy-Eared Dwarf Lemur is really God's own tree-dwelling angel-on-earth and on the coded instructions showing how to grow a prize-winning mushroom, which the author cunningly gleaned from a close textural analysis of St. Paul's third birthday card to the Corinthians."

The author's biography on the publisher's website reads as follows:

"MS. ELIYZABETH YANNE STRONG IS A CHRISTIAN EVANGELIST SPEAKER:   AND A CHRISTIAN HOLY BIBLE WRITER/TEACHER:  CHOSEN AND CALLED BY THE HOLYSPIRIT GOD: MS. ELIYZABETH  STARTED TWO CHRISTIAN CABLE TELEVISION PRODUCTIONS IN 1996:  CALLED: CHRISTIAN POWER! HEALTH PROSPERITY AND SOUL!!  ALSO : AND  ALSO > TEENAGER AND KIDS TELEVISION PRODUCTION CALLED:> CHILDREN RAISED IN THE LOVE OF JESUS. *SHE ALSO STARTED A CHRISTIAN BASE MILITARY CHRISTIAN BOOKSTORES AND MALL CART BUSINESS DURING IN 1991.  ALL THREE CHRISTIAN MINISTRIES ARE > NOW  ONLINE CHRISTIAN WEBSITES UNDER THE NAMES:
http://christianpowerbookstores.spreadtheword.com/ **

http://group.msn.com/ChristianPowerHealthProsperityAndSoul ALSO >;
http://groups.msn.com/ChildrenRaisedInTheLoveOfJesus 

"*MS. ELIYZABETH YANNE STRONG: ALSO HAS A 1ST DEGREE BLACK BELT IN TAEJUKENPO KARATE: SHE STARTED A KIDS & TEEN: KARATE MEMBERSHIP &; TV CLUB: CALLED: KARATE PLAY: IN 1996-2000: SHE IS NOW: STARTING: RECREATION CITY KARATE CLASSES IN TUCSON ARIZONA: WITH GOALS TO OFFER PRIVATE MEMBERSHIP KARATE CLUB CLASSES. 

"MS. ELIYZABETH YANNE STRONG-ANDERSON: ALSO PETITION FOR THE MAYOR SEAT IN TUCSON ARIZONA IN 1998. BECAUSE OF ORGANIZED CRIMES, POLICTICAL RACISM AND CHRISTIAN PERSECUTION AGAINST ELIYZABETH: HOLYSPIRIT EVANGELIST LIFE: IN THE PAST 10 YEARS: GOD HAS DIRECTED MS. ELIYZABETH YANNE STRONG-ANDERSON: TO WRITE THIS BOOK OF REMEMBRANCE, AND THIS BOOK OF REPENTANCE: TO HELP SAVE THE WORLD: THROUGH GOD AND CHRIST JESUS: IF YOU BELEIVE: YOU CAN RECIEVE JOHN 3:3-16. *REMEMBERING: MATTHEW 4:17-26: JESUS SAID: REPENT! THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN IS AT HAND: **COME AND FOLLOW ME: AND I WILL MAKE YOU FISHERS OF MEN!! MY FIRST CHRISTIAN BOOK IS DIRECTED BY GOD: AND THE TRUE CALL TO ETERNAL LIFE SALVATION IS IN IT: GIVEN TO ME FROM: EMMANUEL CHRIST JESUS: > JESUS SAID: JOHN 14:15-16 If ye love me, keep my commandments. 

"VISIT MY NEW YOUTUBE WEBSITE CHANNEL FOR QUESTIONS:
"HTTP://WWW.YOUTUBE.COM/ELIYZABETHSTRONG"

The Blu-Ray/HD-DVD War

Like many, we got an HD-DVD player in December.

Here was the logic: "They keep predicting the end of this battle, but it keeps going on. Picking one or the other seems like a fool's game. But they make combo players that will play both, which seems like a fairly safe thing to have when the battle finally ends."

But then we went to the store. Combo player: $1,000. HD or Blu-ray individually: less than $400 each. It would have been cheaper to buy both players than to buy the combo player. So there goes that theory.

But even I think that bringing two DVD players into the house at once is excessive, so we figured we'd get one of them now and would probably eventually wind up with both at some future date. So we looked at what was available on both formats.

We found that Blu-Ray seemed to focus primarily on hot new releases, especially of the action and violence and gore variety. Lots of Die Hard, lots of Saw, lots of focus on what came out last week. HD-DVD, on the other hand, seemed to have a much broader range. More obvious catalog titles (Robin Hood, Casablanca, Clockwork Orange).

So we got a Toshiba HD player. It turned out to have an added advantage of intelligent upconversion. Unlike our other upconverting DVD player, this one didn't automatically stretch everything to a 16:9 aspect ratio. It recognized the difference between a 4:3 signal and a 16:9 signal, and it upconverted 4:3 pictures while maintaining the 4:3 aspect ratio.

Two months later, Warner Bros. stopped releasing titles in HD-DVD format, and Toshiba announced that they were killing the format. After the biggest Christmas season ever, after having sold more HD-DVD players in December than they'd ever sold before, they yanked the carpet out from under their customers. And Best Buy "generously" offered a $50 gift card to anyone who bought an HD player from them in December.

A few weeks ago, we happened to be in Best Buy with that $50 gift card.

There was an "open box" LG combo HD-DVD/Blu-Ray player for $300. The one that had been selling for $1,000 at Christmas, the one on that very day available on the other side of the store for $600, selling over here for $300. The sticker on the outside of the box was marked with check boxes giving the store the opportunity to say whether the product was missing parts or damaged, but these boxes weren't checked. So we combined the $50 gift card with a couple other gift cards we had, and we took home the combo player for a cash outlay of about $100.

The only problem was that it turned out not to have a remote control. We called Best Buy to complain and talk about this. It turns out that they do not consider the remote control to be a "part" that can be "missing." If an open-box DVD player does not have its remote control, that doesn't constitute a "missing part" because they assume that whoever buys it will just come back to Best Buy and buy a universal remote from them. (Yes, that's they way they put it: "We just figured you'd buy a universal remote from us to replace it.")

I wrote to Best Buy online to complain that their doing this was, in fact, misleading us about the actual cost of the product. If we had known in advance that we'd be paying $350 or $400 instead of the $300 that the box showed, we might have felt differently about buying it in the first place. Their response (direct quote from e-mail): "Though I cannot verify what signs were on the boxes at the store that day, I would like to offer you a $30 gift card to assist you with the purchase of a universal remote."

Yes, in essence they might as well have said, "You are probably lying about the store failing to mark the box as having parts missing, but in my generosity, I'll graciously give you $30 toward a universal remote just to shut you up."

The good folks at Best Buy just don't know when to stop digging, do they?

So now we have a combo player that seems to work fine. We found a remote that will work with it. It doesn't upconvert as well as the Toshiba (it stretches all pictures to 16:9 when upconverting), but it plays both Blu-Ray and HD-DVDs. All in all, regardless of the rigmarole and corporate pig-headedness, it was a darn good deal.

But we're still less likely to spend a lot of time or money at Best Buy.

Political phone harassment

We screen our calls. Period. We get so many phone calls from the SF Police, the SF Fire Department, politicians calling to endorse this candidate or that proposition, surveys and polls that we just don't answer the phone until we know that it's someone we want to talk to.

When I got home tonight, the phone rang, and the caller hung up during the fourth ring -- not long enough for the fourth ring to finish, but long enough that the answering machine picked up. Ten or fifteen minutes later, it happened again. Chip said this had been happening regularly since mid-afternoon.

The phone rang this way every ten to fifteen minutes, never finishing its last ring, and a dial tone coming out of the answering machine.

Finally, I had enough of it. I answered the phone and didn't say anything for a few seconds until I heard a tentative, "Hello?"

"Yes."

"Can I speak to Chip Hoover please?"

"Who's calling?"

He gave me his name.

"And you're calling from...?"

"I want to talk to him about the primary elections."

Oh, to have had the presence of mind to have said, "You didn't answer my question. Where are you calling from?"

Instead, I said, "Are you the reason that our phone has been ringing every ten minutes?"

"What?'

"Our phone has been ringing off the hook all night, and whoever it is hasn't been leaving messages. If you're the reason our phone has been going crazy, we certainly don't want to talk to you."

"Are you Chip Hoover?"

"No."

"Okay, thanks, bye."

Click.

Grrrr........

While I was typing this, they called back.

"Is this William Green?"

"Who's calling?"

He gave a name, "...and I'm calling about the upcoming June primary. There are some democratic candidates that--"

"Are you the reason my phone's been ringing off the hook?"

"I believe this is the first time I've called."

"I get the impression that an auto-dialer has been calling this number for several hours until someone picked up the phone. Thank you for calling. Good night."

Double-Grrrr.....

[Thursday morning P.S.: The phone didn't ring again all night.]